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  • Writer's pictureSarita Dhankani


Updated: Nov 8, 2021

Let me tell you a story

I was once traveling for a leisure trip with family for around 5 days. This trip was long awaited and me along with all others were really excited about it. 3 days before the trip i was shopping for all the clothes, shoes and other stuff that I wanted to carry for this trip.

When I started packing, I filled in my bag with all essential items, clothes, 5 different pair of shoes, some food items, some non essential items (incase of emergency).. Later I realized that I have over stuffed my bag, and it was very difficult to even zip my bag. I then filled in the rest of the stuff in my husbands bag and we were good to go..

While packing I ensured that I had everything with me before I left.. even though it was too much but I wanted to carry all of it..

When we reached the airport.. We had excess baggage and weren't allowed so much on our ticket. Both my husband and me had extra luggage.. and hence to accommodate that extra luggage we had to pay an extra amount.

I was really feeling bad, because the amount that we paid was equivalent to the price of 2 tickets. Had i not packed so much, I wouldn't have had to pay that much..

When we reached our destination, it was difficult for us to carry that much of baggage .. It was slowing us down and took a lot of our physical energy. I then thought of so many things that weren't required but I was still carrying them. However since we had already reached our destination.. We had to carry all that extra weight with us.

Moral of the story

Even though we feel somethings are absolutely necessary and hence we carry them with us, we most often operate out of our insecurities... and end up carrying things which may not be useful or beneficial for us.

However if we put our insecurities down and look at life with more clarity, we will be able to let go of a lot of preconceived notions and save ourselves and others from the weight of the unnecessary items that we don't require in life

Lets talk about emotional baggage

How often do we carry unnecessary emotional baggage with us, which not only makes us slow and weighs us down.. but also weighs our loved ones down. because we unknowingly put that weight on others.

Oftentimes in life, we carry items that we don’t need with us. Concerns of jealousy or lovability. Overreactions based on fear. “Control issues.” Projections of pain from earlier, unmet needs. Cynicism stemming from previous relationships and personal experiences that have nothing to do with our current partners or friends.

How do we break free from the emotional baggage?

Begin by asking yourself these questions?

When did you last feel angry, vulnerable, insecure, guilty, ashamed, fearful, hurt, sad, depressed or stressed?

How did you vent it out ? (or maybe you didn't vent out)

Is overcoming difficult emotions easy? How soon do you move on from one emotion to another?

Have you ever been judged or criticized for expressing your emotions?

Do you sometimes or most of the times carry your past thoughts, emotions and memories in the future?

If you see that you are packing unnecessary items and getting some insights by asking yourself the above questions, good job. It’s a good indication that you are ready to unburden yourself of some emotional baggage and move on with your life.

  1. Accept Responsibility For Your Past: Recognize it for what it was and how it impacted you. Make peace with your role in the interactions and recognize how you’ve grown from the experiences.

  2. Feel It to Heal It : Emotions are normal, however intensified emotions can harm us. The reason why emotions intensify is that we hold on to it and do not vent out in a proper way. The best way to let go of emotions that weigh us down is to to FEEL IT. When you feel your emotions rather than that just trying to make yourself feel better, you're opening a portal within you through which you release the energy associated with these emotions and once you feel it and vent it out, you will see that a part of you heals. There are various ways to vent out emotions (Will talk about it in my next blog)

  3. Respond To Red Flags Only When You See Them: Red Flags are red so they can be spotted. If similar, unhealthy patterns in your new relationships are obvious, then, by all means, respond to them. But if they aren’t there, don’t operate as if they are (and if you find yourself struggling to get out of the cycle of unhealthy relationships, seek professional help)

  4. Emotional Detox : It's a 5 step technique that focuses on helping you to cleanse the toxicity of the mind. Emotions when not dealt with properly stagnate and give rise to intense emotions which affect our relationships, career, health, personal, professional and social life. These stagnant emotions act as obstacles in our life and destroy the very purpose that we are born to experience. (Get in touch with us for our intense emotional detox challenge that will ensure you achieve a breakthrough in different areas of your life)

  5. Enjoy The Trip: There are no guarantees in life. It’s impossible to protect yourself from hurt and heartbreak. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t worth creating strong connections with family, friends and romantic partners. The fact that life is unpredictable, with twists and turns, makes each moment together that much more valuable. Focus on the present and enjoy the trip!

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